Dear Poppy,

Here’s what I remember about the day you were born:

We’d been at the hospital for about 24 hours, I think. Daddy, Grandma and Grandpa and Papa were there on Sunday evening (they watched a Cubs game and played euchre), and Daddy spent the night there with me.

I didn’t want to take any kind of pain medication, but the nurse gave me something late Sunday night so I could sleep. And on Monday, the anesthesiologist came in to give me the epidural. About 10 minutes later, he was my favorite person in the whole world.

Your daddy was there with me the whole time, until Papa talked him into going downstairs for some coffee. A few minutes later, the doctor came in and said we needed to get you out, that you weren’t responding well to the medicine they’d given me to help you along. I said OK, whatever would be best for you. I signed the papers, your daddy came back in, and we were off.

I remember my mouth was so dry. I remember your daddy peeking over to see them pull you out. I remember him telling me, “I see her.” I remember how time stood still after that until, finally, I heard you cry for the first time and I was at peace.

You make me laugh every day. And so many things you do and things you say, honey, I want to freeze in my mind forever.

• The way you say, “There she is!” and “Good morning, Mommy!” when I come into your room in the mornings.
• When you tell me, “I love you, too, honey.”
• Every last one of your smiles.
• The way you say “milp-k” rather than “milk.”
• The expression on your face when you charge at me full-throttle for a hug.
• The way you try to comfort me whenever you’re upset. “Mommy’s OK,” you say. “Mommy’s just fine.”
• Your glee at seeing your stuffed “buddies” – Ernie, Mickey Mouse, Grover – in the mornings and after your naps.
• Your very earnest dancing.
• Your hugs and kisses.
• Your enthusiasm.
• The way we cuddled on the couch tonight before you went to bed. And you said, “Sing ‘Peace Like a River,’ Mommy.” And, “Sing ‘Bear,” Mommy.” And you played with my hair while I sang to you.

I can hardly remember what my life was before you came along. I’m certain that I never imagined having so much joy in my life. I thank God for you every day.

Happy birthday, my peach, my plum, my little bird. I love you more than I can say.

Love,
Mommy

I am a very blessed man.

Every day, I have the chance to spend time with my wife and daughter. I usually get home around 6:00 in the evening. Nichole is usually busy making dinner or she’s in the living room playing with Poppy. When I step in the door, I hear,”DADDDYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!” and this small whirlwind of hair and flailing limbs comes running around the corner to meet me at the toddler gate next to the kitchen.

“Hi Poppy!”

“Daddy, up?” she says with her arms reaching up.

And so I pick her up and much silliness ensues. Sometimes we play in her igloo/tent, tickling and laughing. Sometimes we read books in the floor. Sometimes we finish watching a show she’s been watching. Usually we wind up slumped in the floor from all the silliness. I usally have enough energy for one more tickle.

Whatever we do, it always makes me smile. It’s the best part of my day. I come home, and I realize why I go to work everyday, why I put in those crazy hours, sometimes sleeping only a couple hours a night. I do it so that Nichole can spend everyday getting to know her daughter. I do it because I love them so much.

On Wednesday, Poppy turns 2. I can’t really wrap my brain around it sometimes. She has grown so fast, she says so many new words everyday. I remember the way she came into this world: emergency C-section on a rainy Monday afternoon in Missouri.

I remember seeing her for the first time and realizing that nothing would ever be the same.
I remember how small she was.
I remember driving 80 miles an hour down Providence Road in Columbia to get her to the hospital when she was dehydrated from the flu and needed fluids.
I remember wondering if she would sleep through the night.
I remember wondering last weekend if she was ever going to wake up so I could play with her.

******

My good friends Chris and Sinead are about to be parents. I can’t really say what it’s been like for Nichole so Sinead, I’m sorry, you’ll have to ask her for more particulars. Chris, you need to enjoy each and everyday. Read all the books you can to your child, play with them in the floor, push the stroller, take them with you wherever you go. This little person will cling to you and love you like no one else ever will and the bond you share is stronger than you could ever imagine. Make the most of every opportunity you have to be with them. Give Sinead a little extra help after the baby arrives because she’s going to be a little tired for a while. Get up and change those diapers and do the late night feedings. Don’t act like a Dad, be a Dad.

I have every faith in you, Chris.

*******

Ever since Poppy came into our world, I’ve been much more emotional. I cried at the end of “The Bridge to Terabithia” when I watched it on an airplane. I’ve also gotten much less tolerant in what I allow into Poppy’s presence and surroundings. We have a strict no potty-mouth policy. And pretty much we watch mostly Sesame Street and Clifford’s Puppy Days. Anyway, I find that song lyrics really get to me more than they did before. By this I mean, I tend to get weepy when I’m in the car alone driving to work listening to Dan Fogleberg sing “The Leader of the Band.” Combine this with my love of ’70s-era singer song writers and it’s a recipe for Dr. Phil. However, I know that my love of music must be wearing off on Poppy. Here is a list of her favorite songs:

Bread – Guitar Man (much to the chagrin of Nichole)
Wilco – Either Way, Shake It off, Kingpin
Gerry Rafferty – Baker Street
James Taylor – Mud Slide Slim and The Blue Horizon
Sufjan Stevens – Sleeping Bear, Sault St. Marie
Elizabeth Mitchell – Peace Like a River
America – Sister Golden Hair

I guess I should stop rambling. It’s just that when the topic is Poppy, I could write volume upon volume about how much I love her. So I guess I’ll end with this from Bob Dylan:

May God bless and keep you always,
May your wishes all come true,
May you always do for others
And let others do for you.
May you build a ladder to the stars
And climb on every rung,
May you stay forever young,
Forever young, forever young,
May you stay forever young.

May you grow up to be righteous,
May you grow up to be true,
May you always know the truth
And see the lights surrounding you.
May you always be courageous,
Stand upright and be strong,
May you stay forever young,
Forever young, forever young,
May you stay forever young.

May your hands always be busy,
May your feet always be swift,
May you have a strong foundation
When the winds of changes shift.
May your heart always be joyful,
May your song always be sung,
May you stay forever young,
Forever young, forever young,
May you stay forever young.

I love you, Poppy. Happy Birthday.